The fat lady has been muzzled

Over in the Lone Star state, Brandon Backe and Woody Williams flirted with perfection. Backe ran a no-hitter 'til the 6th and and both pitchers rang up goose eggs on the ol' scoreboard in 15 combined innings of work before Jason Isringhausen coughed up three runs in the bottom of the ninth. This is what we usually expect from a championship game -- two competitors running neck-and-neck, challenging each other inning after inning. This was postseason perfection.

And back under the shadow of the Green Monster, there was imperfection. Loads of it. Longest ALCS game ever, as a matter of fact -- took 14 innings and 14 pitchers just to sort this mess out. Moose came out triumphant over Pedro to kick it all off, but the game belonged to the Red Sox after the 6th inning...even if these guys couldn't catch a break until Tim McCarver exhausted every last one of his shot-calling aphorisms.

There was Bronson Arroyo, he of the golden cornrows, stepping to the mound after a disastrous Game 3 start and fooling the best part of the Yankees' order with filthy stuff. And Mike Myers, whose sidearm delivery moves s-l-o-w-e-r than a lady of leisure unfolding an Chinese fan, rattling off four pitches of molasses. And Alan Embree finishing off the inning by striking out two straight batters. And Tim Wakefield scaring the bejeesus out of everyone but the Red Sox Nation hopefuls with what seemed like at least sixteen straight passed balls. Varitek couldn't even restrain Wakefield's knuckle.

Don't doubt for a second that David Ortiz said what you thought he said after the ump called him out on a what-game-were-you-watching checked swing, though. Ortiz clearly turned to the camera and mouthed "That's bullshit!" before returning to the dugout and finding himself at the receiving end of a series of bad calls that deserved far greater expletives. Who could blame him? Dude was so enraged that he ripped a soft Esteban Loaiza pitch right into center with two outs in the 14th to bring Johnny Damon home and send the Yankees back to New York licking their wounds.

Best way to combat indifference and doubt? If you're the Braves, you fold and regroup. But in Boston and Houston, you stay hungry. I don't think there's every been a postseason performance to match what Carlos Beltran is doing for the Astros. He's en fuego, with a home run in, like, every third at-bat -- he is the team. And Ortiz? He keeps saving the day, too. He's not going to carry Boston like Beltran with the Astros, but he's doing collateral damage with that .500 postseason average. And he's pissed off. Walk him, pitch around him, trick him into a ground ball out, whatever -- just stay the fuck out of his way.