That Championship Season
Right now, Oakland and Houston are running at full court press. Both teams' records rested right around the .500 mark earlier this month, but after several months of win-lose-win-lose leapfrogging, the As and the 'Stros have gone 9-1 in their last ten games. This is what we expect from these franchises, both of which underperformed at the start of the season -- Billy Beane and Ken Macha love the underdog status and Phil Garner can't resist a good fight.
Head over to the NL East and the Nationals just can't keep it together. You may recall the Expos late-season identity crisis and attendant implosion after acquiring Bartolo Colon and Cliff Floyd a few years back. That's what's going on in Washington now as momentum has drained and Omar Minaya and Frank Robinson attempt to keep the ship from sinking with some spare parts. Nothing against Preston Wilson, Ryan Drese, Junior Spivey et al, but any team where Vinny Castilla and turdbox Cristian Guzman have soaked up that much playing time is bound to fail. These moves should have come a month or two into the season. It might be strange to talk about a team that's currently 55-48 in these terms, but a 2-8 record in the last 10 games speaks for itself. Everything Washington does, Atlanta does better.
Still, the worst best team in the majors right now is the Padres -- a drubbing last night at the hands of the Reds pushed the Pads' record to under .500. The Padres are the first team to lead their division with a losing record this late in the season since 1994. 18 teams in baseball have a superior record. And this team is 18-33 since June 1st. How do you keep losing like that and remain at the top of your division? The whole NL West is genuinely terrible; AZ, LA, SF and Colorado aren't putting up a threat. The dominance of St. Louis at the White Sox might play a role in skewing the standings, but the Padres really can't win outside of Petco. Right now, they can't win at all -- they'd have better odds of deciding the outcome of a game with a coin toss.
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
Keeping Up With the Joneses
ESPN so hired the wrong guy. Todd Jones (in the midst of his best season ever) has been chronicling the Marlins' fortunes in a blog for The Palm Beach Post and he definitely has the idea of writing for the web down pat. His posts are eloquent and witty and he's quick to put his intentions and thoughts right out there. Amen to the post about the lack of fan support at Turner Field: "I'd rather go to see the game marketed well than just sit around and wait for a no-hitter." And, if you dig far enough back in the archives, you'll find Jones giving some love to former Tigers (and current Marlins) 'pen mate Brian Moehler -- which is reciprocated in the comments section by Moehler's father-in-law!
ESPN so hired the wrong guy. Todd Jones (in the midst of his best season ever) has been chronicling the Marlins' fortunes in a blog for The Palm Beach Post and he definitely has the idea of writing for the web down pat. His posts are eloquent and witty and he's quick to put his intentions and thoughts right out there. Amen to the post about the lack of fan support at Turner Field: "I'd rather go to see the game marketed well than just sit around and wait for a no-hitter." And, if you dig far enough back in the archives, you'll find Jones giving some love to former Tigers (and current Marlins) 'pen mate Brian Moehler -- which is reciprocated in the comments section by Moehler's father-in-law!
Friday, July 08, 2005
Small Wonder
Earlier this week, Sony spokeswoman Shoko Yanagisawa brought a 2 foot tall robot named QRIO to RFK Stadium to throw out the first pitch. The Nationals dropped the game to the Mets, but QRIO made a distinct impression with a clean fastball straight to the catcher's mitt. QRIO knows how to dance and has a vocabulary of 65,000 Japanese words. He also knows how to talk smack. Here's a portion of an interview I was able to conduct before the game through a Japanese translator:
Hey, great arm -- President Bush couldn't even land it over the plate.
HA HA. BZZAP! LAURA'S WIFE CAN EAT A BAG OF DICKS.
If the opposing pitcher was beaning your teammates, how would you respond?
I WOULD REPLACE JOSE GUILLEN'S RITALIN WITH NO-DOZ AND WATCH HIM RIP THE PANELS OFF THE CENTER FIELD WALL AND TURN HIM INTO A HUMAN TWINKIE.
What's wrong with Cristian Guzman anyway?
BZZAP! I FEEL BAD FOR MY HOMIE. IT ISN'T EASY BEING THE WORST PLAYER IN THE HISTORY OF BASEBALL. ACTUALLY, IT IS EASY -- WHICH IS THE PROBLEM. DUDE NEEDS TO QUIT AND JOIN A PROFESSIONAL T-BALL LEAGUE.
What's your favorite part of the new (old) stadium experience?
ALEXANDER HAMILTON HAS SKILLZ. HE CAN DRIVE HIS CAR AND STOP AT AN ATM TO COUNT HIS MONEY AND STILL WIN THE RACE. WHEN MY AGENT SCOTT BORAS GETS ME OUT OF MY CONTRACT WITH SONY, I'LL BE GETTING MAD LOOT, HA HA HA.
Wait-you've retained Scott Boras as your agent?
GEORGE STEINBRENNER WILL PAY FOR ANYTHING. LOOK AT HOW MUCH MONEY HIDEKI IRABU GOT FOR TAKING A BREAK FROM THE BUFFET LINE. BZZAP! I MAINTAIN CONSTANT PITCH LOCATION AND VELOCITY THROUGH MY SUPERIOR PROGRAMMING. OTHER ATHELETES NEED TO GIVE 110%; I AM CAPABLE OF PERFORMING WELL AT 50%, WHICH LEAVES 60% FOR ME TO TEACH CRISTIAN GUZMAN HOW TO PLAY, TOO.
I suppose you've got a point...
I'M TAKING IT STRAIGHT TO THE MEIKYUKAI, MUTHAFUCKA.
Earlier this week, Sony spokeswoman Shoko Yanagisawa brought a 2 foot tall robot named QRIO to RFK Stadium to throw out the first pitch. The Nationals dropped the game to the Mets, but QRIO made a distinct impression with a clean fastball straight to the catcher's mitt. QRIO knows how to dance and has a vocabulary of 65,000 Japanese words. He also knows how to talk smack. Here's a portion of an interview I was able to conduct before the game through a Japanese translator:
Hey, great arm -- President Bush couldn't even land it over the plate.
HA HA. BZZAP! LAURA'S WIFE CAN EAT A BAG OF DICKS.
If the opposing pitcher was beaning your teammates, how would you respond?
I WOULD REPLACE JOSE GUILLEN'S RITALIN WITH NO-DOZ AND WATCH HIM RIP THE PANELS OFF THE CENTER FIELD WALL AND TURN HIM INTO A HUMAN TWINKIE.
What's wrong with Cristian Guzman anyway?
BZZAP! I FEEL BAD FOR MY HOMIE. IT ISN'T EASY BEING THE WORST PLAYER IN THE HISTORY OF BASEBALL. ACTUALLY, IT IS EASY -- WHICH IS THE PROBLEM. DUDE NEEDS TO QUIT AND JOIN A PROFESSIONAL T-BALL LEAGUE.
What's your favorite part of the new (old) stadium experience?
ALEXANDER HAMILTON HAS SKILLZ. HE CAN DRIVE HIS CAR AND STOP AT AN ATM TO COUNT HIS MONEY AND STILL WIN THE RACE. WHEN MY AGENT SCOTT BORAS GETS ME OUT OF MY CONTRACT WITH SONY, I'LL BE GETTING MAD LOOT, HA HA HA.
Wait-you've retained Scott Boras as your agent?
GEORGE STEINBRENNER WILL PAY FOR ANYTHING. LOOK AT HOW MUCH MONEY HIDEKI IRABU GOT FOR TAKING A BREAK FROM THE BUFFET LINE. BZZAP! I MAINTAIN CONSTANT PITCH LOCATION AND VELOCITY THROUGH MY SUPERIOR PROGRAMMING. OTHER ATHELETES NEED TO GIVE 110%; I AM CAPABLE OF PERFORMING WELL AT 50%, WHICH LEAVES 60% FOR ME TO TEACH CRISTIAN GUZMAN HOW TO PLAY, TOO.
I suppose you've got a point...
I'M TAKING IT STRAIGHT TO THE MEIKYUKAI, MUTHAFUCKA.
Friday, July 01, 2005
My Milkshake Brings All the Boys to the Yard
Third game of the season for me in three different cities -- this time, in the cavernous environs of RFK Stadium. Messiah scored some sweet tickets on the first base line through his firm and I met up with the Blogroll All-Stars (Sean, Dan, Rachel) to see the Nationals continue their home-field dominance. First stop: Bill Cosby's favorite D.C. haunt, Ben's Chili Bowl, for chili-covered things and a pina colada milkshake. Great place to eat if you don't mind waiting (what seems like) hours to pay your check. So, anyway, the game: Esteban Loaiza carried a no-hitter through the 5th and the Nationals finished the month of June with a 20-6 record.
Still waiting for Dan to join the fray on his tract of internet real estate, but Sean has some deep thoughts and random musings about RFK's lack of ambiance up already. Not sure the Nationals are doing everything they could be doing to enrich fan relations with a winning team in town; everything -- from the dull banners draped over the outfield walls to the preternaturally mincing mascot Screech -- seems like an afterthought. Still, there are worse places to see a game: like the sixth circle of hell, where every seat has an enormous wad of chewing gum stuck to it (like mine) and the blue raspberry sno cones dye your teeth forever. See, Three Rivers Stadium wasn't so bad.
Third game of the season for me in three different cities -- this time, in the cavernous environs of RFK Stadium. Messiah scored some sweet tickets on the first base line through his firm and I met up with the Blogroll All-Stars (Sean, Dan, Rachel) to see the Nationals continue their home-field dominance. First stop: Bill Cosby's favorite D.C. haunt, Ben's Chili Bowl, for chili-covered things and a pina colada milkshake. Great place to eat if you don't mind waiting (what seems like) hours to pay your check. So, anyway, the game: Esteban Loaiza carried a no-hitter through the 5th and the Nationals finished the month of June with a 20-6 record.
Still waiting for Dan to join the fray on his tract of internet real estate, but Sean has some deep thoughts and random musings about RFK's lack of ambiance up already. Not sure the Nationals are doing everything they could be doing to enrich fan relations with a winning team in town; everything -- from the dull banners draped over the outfield walls to the preternaturally mincing mascot Screech -- seems like an afterthought. Still, there are worse places to see a game: like the sixth circle of hell, where every seat has an enormous wad of chewing gum stuck to it (like mine) and the blue raspberry sno cones dye your teeth forever. See, Three Rivers Stadium wasn't so bad.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)