R-O-I-D-S spell 'relief'

Ray Durham. Eli Marrero. Richie Sexson. Chipper Jones. Add in Austin Kearns aka The Unluckiest Man in Baseball -- who had his arm broken by a Ryan Voglesong fastball, and MLB player are dropping like flies this week. All strained groins and muscle injuries. Even sparkplug David Eckstein went down with a hamstring injury. I think I'm sentencing myself to an afterlife of eternal hellfire for even suggesting this, but it's sooooo fishy. I can't help but think our favorite players are going cold turkey on the 'roids and supplements to avoid detection in the next round of drug tests. Findings from the last round of tests implicated this guy, and results from the second round (when names can be named and fingers can be pointed) could cause irrepairable damage to a player's credibility. Or the fragile psyches of our nation's children, as our President would have us believe. Look at Jason Giambi this year and tell me he wasn't on 'roids before -- he's (literally) half the man he used to be. This hollistic health nut is leading a one-woman crusade against "the most abused class of drugs in your doctor's black bag." Cut through some of that purple prose, and there's a wealth of information about the healing properties of steroids. Players who take steroids do not get injured at the same rate as players who do not take steroids. But what's really dirty is Barry Bonds' trainer trying to tie things up indefinitely in litigation. Guess who will be joining me in hell?